Page one. Panel one.
All the tropes are getting held up.
My breasts or my backstory,
Let's see which is more developed.
I'm the character you're writing.
The only one that's female.
I feel like Smurfette.
I guess that makes you Gargamel.
Don't fridge me, bro.
I'm not a plot device to stroke your ego.
I'm not your damsel or your tramp,
And I'm not your...
Sexy lamp.
Write me dialog,
That's more than pure emotion.
Give me clothes that,
Might survive a small explosion.
Midriff, high heels.
I won't be chasing anyone.
Please tell the criminals,
Not to shoot and not to run.
Don't fridge me, bro.
I'm not a plot device to stroke your ego.
I'm not your damsel or your tramp,
And I'm not your...
Sexy lamp.
Even with a cheat sheet,
You couldn't pass a Bechdel Test.
It seems you need to see me,
Oppressed or undressed.
I'm not from Venus.
I'm from the same planet as you.
Write me like I'm human,
Or give me to Kelly Sue.
Don't fridge me, bro.
I'm not a plot device to stroke your ego.
I'm not your damsel or your tramp,
And I'm not your...
Sexy lamp.
Don't fridge me, bro.
I'm not a plot device to stroke your ego.
I'm not your damsel or your tramp,
And I'm not your...
No, I'm not your...
Sexy lamp.